Elise's first Christmas

Merry Christmas! This was Elise's first and we used that excuse to celebrate it as heartily as possible.

We began early, not only with aforementioned Christmas decoration viewing and Christmas cookie baking, but with a visit from Grandpa Les, Grandma, and Uncle Brian.

Both girls loved having extra family members to play with them (as did Mommy and Daddy). Elise zeroed in on Grandpa Les and astounded audiences with her brilliant (and adorable) conversations with him, consisting of exhuberant gurgles and coos. So popular was her performance that she went on to regale other family members in a similar fashion.

"Finally, I found a way to get some attention around here," she was later heard gurgling good-naturedly.

And for her part, Kalina greeted Uncle Brian like a long-lost friend. He patiently followed her around the house as she made all the preparations to feed forest animals, rubber snakes, and others, narrating her every move.

Of course, Grandma was equally popular, particularly for her upside-down watercolor artistry, which allowed Kalina to create a happy scene of cats, birds, butterflies and more.

And then the 2nd-biggest day of the year arrived: Christmas Eve. Elise was passed from one set of arms to the next as preparations were made for the big day itself.

When both girls were prodded/bribed into their Christmas dresses (colored marshmallows: special for Christmas!) and we were out the door to Christmas Eve church, the fun officially began. Not only was the service lovely and my girls adorable, but Kalina tuned in like never before. A simple dance caught her attention and she watched the whole thing, wide eyed and grinning ear to ear, seeming to hope everyone else on the stage would break into dance as well. Afterward, she said she wanted to twist and turn like the dancer. She will likely take ballet at some point.

On the way home, we ignored Elise's annoyed grunts and took a detour to check out Christmas lights. They were lovely and we all had fun trying to get Kalina to look out the correct car window to see the lights.

Shortly after our late supper of soup and Matt's amazing rye bread, we began putting the girls down for bed. To Elise, it was just another night, but we had fun building suspense for Kalina.

Yes, it was probably stupid of us to give Kalina an excuse not to sleep that night. We did, however, have good reason: it's Christmas! So I read her The Night Before Christmas by the Christmas tree, and carefully explained the Santa part of the Christmas story (having appropriately drilled into her the Jesus part), with emphasis on the "fact" that flying reindeer would land on her roof. I told her Santa would put presents in her stocking, and that Mommy and Daddy had a big gift for her. The girl could hardly believe her lucky stars. What a great idea for a holiday! Family, good food, presents, a Christmas tree, and reindeer!

As Matt tucked Kalina into bed, the toddler mentioned that she's excited. She also told him that her stuffed cats were excited, and would be meowing from excitement. As he closed the door, he heard soft meows coming from her crib. Precious.

I wish I could say we all slept peacefully dreaming of sugar plums, but I cannot (Santa may not visit next year if I tell untruths!). Elise, for her part, didn't do too poorly--she did so well, in fact, that Mommy got a 4-hour stretch! However, after an additional 2-hour stretch, my brain decided I'd had more than enough sleep for one night and pretty much kept me up after 3:52. Kalina didn't help, waking at 5:30 and needing to be settled back to sleep. Only the adrenaline of Christmas morning saved the day, and it took a while to get the full amount I needed.

When Kalina woke for real, our first order of business was to get her as wound up in anticipation as possible before heading downstairs to open the big present Matt and I had draped in wrapping paper the night before.

We realize we were a bit crazy for buying Kalina (and Elise--we're making Kalina share) the large Calico Critters dollhouse, plus play table, plus lots of animals and furniture for Christmas (and her next birthday). But we got a Craigslist deal we couldn't refuse, about 3 days before Elise was born.

Our purchase proved justified when Kalina, open-mouthed, ripped off the wrapping paper on Christmas morning. What a delighted little girl! She was even happier when we had her open a cat family and a living room set complete with books. I think she played a full half hour before asking to put the cats down for naps and we had her open a third present: a bunk bed set. And that's all she needed to keep her content for another 2 hours (it helped that Grandma, Grandpa Les and Uncle Brian arrived).

When Elise woke up from her long morning nap, she got to open a few presents as well (or, rather, sit watching as Kalina tore into them for her, "showing her how to open" the gifts). She seemed happy with her presents, and I'm determined to rescue them from Kalina's eager clutches so that she actually gets to enjoy them more as she gets older. Then we all headed out the door to Grandpa Tom's for Christmas dinner and general festivities.

I love big Christmases, and this certainly lived up to my expectations, with Matt's family, my family and a family friend celebrating together. Christmas miracle after Christmas miracle, though, made the day run smoothly, if not joyfully much of the time.

Christmas miracle #1: Elise napped in the pack-and-play! Not great, and not without some work, but enough that we could all enjoy Christmas.

Christmas miracle #2: No toddler meltdowns. As we were headed out the door, I warily informed Kalina that today would be a no-nap day. If we were to gauge it by her smile, this may have been the best gift of all. However, I knew that could come with a price: would she have to leave Christmas early for bad behavior? No she did not. Good girl.

The food was good, the house was festive and the company was jolly--we all had a nice day. Kalina got a bit tired of posing for "a picture in front of the tree with your sister!" but did enjoy being chased around as we tried to wrestle her into one anyway.

On the way home, Kalina caught a quick nap in the car, but Elise did not. And once we were home, both kids were soundly sleeping in their beds within 45 minutes, while the rest of us completely and utterly collapsed. Or maybe that was just me? I have no memory of the evening--I think my brain was finally asleep even if my body wasn't immediately.

Christmas miracle #3? Snow! It snowed overnight, covering every surface in white fluffiness perfect for making a giant snowman and cancelling flights. And so the celebration continued, as Grandpa, Grandma and Uncle Brian all stayed a couple extra days.

We also made it to the Hanks family gift-opening, during which we all ate as many sweets as we possibly could without alerting Kalina to our activities (although she was allowed a Christmas cookie, which she kindly shared with Uncle Tom).

And now, we think we have enough toys to pass the cold winter away.

We all loved Elise's first Christmas. Let's all do it again next year! But no sooner: Mommy needs a long winter's nap (Christmas miracle #4? Please?).

Elise's "Baby's 1st Christmas" ornament: a festive little giraffe (that matches Kalina's festive little teddy bear).

Rudolph the white-tailed deer and other holiday happenings

We've been too busy celebrating Christmas for me to blog about what we've been up to, so here are some random pictures to tide you over until the big, massive family visit/Elise's First Christmas post that we all know is yet to come. Enjoy!

We managed to venture to the local Christmas tree farm to pick out a tree this year. By the skin of our teeth, though: not only did a "diaper incident" almost preclude the trip entirely, but we only had enough cash to pay for our white pine because I remembered there's a returning customer discount of $2.00. Upon arriving home, we discovered that the tree looked a lot smaller on the lot. However, we all love it--our Christmas miracle, I suppose.







Our household's first incident of sibling rivalry captured on film: you can see Kalina's hand trying to yank the beads away from Elise, as well as Elise's look of grim determination not to let her. And is that a kick?










Kalina decorating the tree. When asked what her favorite part about Christmas is, she will tell you the Christmas tree (and ornaments). Not quite as good as "Baby Jesus," but better than "PRESENTS!!!"

It snowed! Elise napped through the whole thing, but Kalina actually willingly suited up in her coat, snow pants and boots (even asking for the boots specifically, having been told in the preceding days/weeks that she'd have to wear them if she wanted to play in snow, and refusing to touch them with a 10-foot pole otherwise) and headed out with Daddy. Next thing I knew, every inch of snow from our yard had been rolled into a giant snowman, which is still there three weeks later.

While Kalina and Daddy were playing in the snow, I decided that as long as we were holing up inside, we might as well make Christmas cookies. Fortunately, I had help. Unfortunately, I ended up having to bribe the help to stop decorating, since although the cookies looked great, the sprinkles aren't quite as good of an adornment for the floor. The bribe? A Christmas cookie, of course.


We love our nativity set and we admittedly love letting Kalina play with it. First, she separated the people from the animals. Then, she carefully lined the animals up. Then she not-so-carefully piled the people up. Then she invited all of the animals into the stable, which was eventually inhabited by only the 3 cats. Everyone else got sent to her play kitchen sink. The next morning, the farm animals (but not the camel), as well as Mary, Baby Jesus, and the manger, were allowed back into the living room. All the animals got put down for naps in the stable.

Oh, and Rudolph the white-tailed deer? Just something we talk about every so often. Yes, we're still obsessed with white-tailed deer, and Kalina loves seeing them (and the occasional reindeer) all around town.

P.S. Sorry about the ridiculous formatting. I'm on a new computer and it doesn't seem to work well with blogging. I may have to explore other options.

Elise's sleep journey: Part 1

Every child is special. And so is every child's sleep. As most of you know by now, we're fairly obsessed with sleep here at the Odegaard household: possibly because we all do so much better when we get enough.

We're all (even Kalina) on a quest to help Elise get the best, most quantificous sleep possible. Here's a summary of the first step in her journey, as designated by the fact that I have the time to write this now.

When Elise was born, after all the ooohing and aaahhing, I began to eye the girl a bit suspiciously. After all, she was a newborn: not only are they notoriously rocky sleepers (asleep in the daytime, awake at night), but they all vary, just like bigger people do.

Just as some newborns grow up to be successful biologists or writers while other less fortunate newborns grow up to be clowns and politicians, some newborns are the rave of their mommies' blogs and Facebook statuses for their lengthy naps and nighttimes, while others' sleep habits are only bemoaned in the same venues.

How would Elise and I get along? I wondered. I'm positive we'll find some things in common (already have: we both enjoy a well-placed window), but until then, will be both be sleeping? Or not?

When anticipating this new baby, I counted on the fact that newbors sleep a lot during the day. I pictured playing with Kalina, helping my older child not feel quite so displaced in her new family, while Elise dozed happily by our sides despite tumbling blocks and toddler shrieks of delight. If this wasn't the case, I had no further strategies: all hope would be lost.

And true to newborn form, Elise slept just fine for the first couple weeks--even nighttimes weren't too bad. I breathed a sigh of relief and focused all my energy in smoothing sisterly relations while Elise dozed in her swing. But I knew from experience that teaching a baby to sleep after the first month is about as difficult as instructing a baby in the fine art of French cooking, so I sent Matt to the library and he came home with armfuls of our old favorite sleep books (and some new ones).

Elise's sleep deteriorated as I read up on ideal waketimes and newborn brain mechanisms, and by the time I felt the slightest bit equipped, I needed all the help I could get. Our philosophy of "she's a newborn, she'll sleep when she needs to," had been fun, but it had also produced a wildly overtired baby who wasn't sleeping much more than our toddler. Trouble. Fortunately, help was on the way.

The Baby Whisperer's book had struck a chord with me. A combination of no-nonsense and a soft heart who advocates understanding your baby, the author offered some concrete techniques for getting a good night--and day--of sleep. Perhaps I was thinking a bit too wistfully, but I also liked her promise that, if I timed put-down correctly, I could simply hold my baby swaddled in a dark room for five minutes, put the baby in the crib, and walk confidently away, anticipating that not only would the baby fall asleep on her own, but she would stay asleep for 1 1/2 to 2 hours. Sign me up!

My initial problem was that, although I only skimmed certain sections of the Baby Whisperer's book, I never saw her mention what to do if you have a toddler trying to scale the side of your baby's crib while you put the baby down in it. Fortunately, after a week or so of trailing behind me into Elise's room, Kalina has decided that she has better things to do with her time while I put the baby down for endless naps. She also rarely attends diaper changes anymore.

I began first thing in the morning, having already noticed that Elise likes nothing better than a good nap almost exactly an hour after waking up. This is also convenient for me, as I can deal with the toddler whirlwind of: "Kalina wants a hardboiled egg to eat on the picnic table. Read a book. The cat is stuck behind the chair and Kalina can't get the cat out! Potty," without having to drag Elise through all of it, poor girl.

I followed instructions to the T, walking confidently away after I'd laid Elise in her crib. Then, at Elise's beckoning, I came back and put the pacifier back in her mouth about a million times, probably, and I might have rocked her a bit (to make sure she's drowsy), and finally she fell asleep. For 20 minutes.

What do you even do with a baby who only sleeps 20 minutes? Or 30? Or 5? First-time moms on the message boards I occasionally visit dreamily talked about holding their baby for all naps. Meanwhile, I did loads of laundry, kept the house clean-ish, baked and freelanced while managing a toddler, too. It's a world of difference.

I repeated the nap routine (sometimes resorting to the swing or carseat when nothing was working) through the next day, and the next, and the next until it seemed that most of my time was spent in a dark room, and I'd blink whenever I saw sunlight. As you can imagine, the addition of darkness to my repeated failure did nothing to improve my frustration. Sometimes the baby would sleep an hour, sometimes 5 minutes, and sometimes not at all, despite hours of trying.

The sleep books told me to put her down earlier: I did. A small part of my brain told me to put her down later: I did. I put her down full and swaddled, I let her fuss a bit, or sat there holding the pacifier in. I ignored the Baby Whisperer and drove her around in the car. I rocked her until my arms were about to fall off. I ran up and down the stairs as I tended to her needs and the toddler's needs at the same time. I spent entire days focusing on naps while Matt and Kalina went out and had all kinds of fun. You name it, I tried it. I could not force the baby to sleep.

It wouldn't have grieved me so much had I hadn't seen Elise's frustration as well: here was a baby who wanted to nap, but couldn't, whether I helped her or left her alone, put her down early or late, etc.! What was I doing wrong? Why can I do all the right things and still not have a napping baby, while other people do nothing and have excellent sleepers? Poor Matt got very tired of having his deer hunting conversations interrupted as I bemoaned Elise's poor sleep. It was officially an obsession.

And then I gave myself a break, and went back to having an overtired baby, and reaching out for help on Facebook (thank you to all who responded, you cheered me up considerably!).

After wallowing in despair for the rest of the day, I decided that there's no budging around the crib nap: Elise hadn't had a good swing nap in days, and wasn't getting any less aware of the toddler bustling around her. I tried harder. Elise seemed to nap a million little times a day, but at least she was napping.

As I persisted, Elise matured, so that about the time I really needed to see progress, she instituted a long morning nap. The household breathed a sigh of relief.

Now, Elise eats once at night (and occasionally wakes up just to be settled one or two other times), and once usually in the 5 a.m. hour (night? morning? we haven't decided). Regardless of when she eats, I make sure she's awake "for the day" by 6:30. She naps an hour afterward (so, around 7:30, give or take), and usually sleeps until 9:30-ish. Yes, it's true!

On a good day, Elise will catnap in the car if we head out after that, and then take a long afternoon nap--but these days only happen maybe 2 times per week, usually on the weekends when Matt's babysitting. The rest of the day, she'll take 45-minute naps, or less if we're out and about. She's not always happy that she can't get back to sleep, but we all manage. And she seems to be dropping her late evening nap, although she still needs to sleep at that time so I'm not really sure what I'll do (probably move bedtime earlier or distract her with a bath).

And our routine is as simple as the Baby Whisperer promised it could be. Simpler, really--Elise doesn't really require rocking anymore, which I'm admittedly a tiny bit disappointed in.

I learned a little about Elise during this time: mostly, that she can't be awake for more than about an hour (sometimes a bit more if we're out) without getting overtired. She also hates being moved or messed with when she's sleepy. "Just give me a swaddle and a pacifier and a dark room and leave me alone!" she seems to say.

She also really can put herself to sleep, as long as the timing is right. Sometimes even without the pacifier, I'd guess.

And it also seems that she's willing to be a decent crib napper, or a decent on-the-go napper, but not both, so I can picture us having to limit our outings in the future. Sleep is important. We will maintain a balance, though--I refuse to stay inside the house for the entirety of the baby's first year just so I can put Elise down for all her naps. Kalina and I both have our sanity to maintain. So we will stay in only on the really cold or wet days.

I must admit that I'm a bit proud for having almost figured out this whole sleep thing, and proud of Elise for the same reason. However, I'm not ready to claim success quite yet: we still have the 4-month sleep regression in our path. I'm sure you'll hear from me again then. Let's hope it's good news.

Photo: Elise helps decorate the Christmas tree!

We love Christmas

I love Christmas. Love it. The whole month of it. And as fun as Christmas has been in the past, it's already gotten better: not only is Kalina as excited as I am (with a little nudging from me, of course), but it's Elise's first. We will be celebrating accordingly.

We began the holiday baking on Monday with cinnamon-sugar almonds. We made a triple batch so we'd have lots of holiday cheer to share.

We're also working on Christmas cards together. Kalina chooses the card (we have two options) and the address label, and I do the writing. So far, she's only chosen the "cardinal card" and the gingerbread man address labels, so I have to substitute occasionally. She's also happy to fold the photos we're sending as she puts them in the card, so if yours arrives creased, I do apologize.

I force Kalina to listen to a Christmas CD a day, even though she'd rather listen to the telling of the Three Little Pigs over and over and over. (Sometimes I suspect she doesn't really listen, but simply uses it as an excuse to not do what Mommy wants to do, but we take turns anyway.) Kalina's taste in music is extremely picky (so picky that she's been known to dance without it--apparenly no music is good enough for some of her moves), but she's admitted to liking Jingle Bells, We Need A Little Christmas and that Christmas song that's sung by children to the tune of Pachelbel's Canon. She also seems to like Rudolph (the white-tailed deer).

Elise, for her part, loves it when Mommy sings Christmas carols to her and moves her little arms in time to the music. The girl is very easy to please. I suspect she'll love a brightly lit Christmas tree as well.

I've also taken Kalina out to look at Christmas decorations, and we've spent some nice time in Target's Christmas section, at the display in the mall and passing Christmas lights in our neighborhood (thank you, kind people, for decorating your houses!). We both excitedly point out Christmas trees and reindeer whenever we see them.

I've tried to explain the real meaning of Christmas several times, but my attempts often end up fumbled, with me almost as confused as Kalina. I try not to focus on the presents, but my complex stories generally end in "and that's why we give presents to each other," as I strive to reconcile the traditions in my own mind. Finally, I turned it over to Veggie Tales, who have more experience in such things than I do. After watching the show about St. Nick, I asked Kalina if she'd learned anything. "No," she said. *sigh* I suppose at 2 1/2 it's still not too important for Kalina to understand the intricacies of theology in the context of mass culture.

And then we talk about what presents we're going to get for our family members. I won't spoil surprises, but Kalina is thinking various animals and fire trucks will be popular this year.

Perhaps best of all, though, is our advent calendar. Bought on a whim after I'd completed an unexpected freelance assignment, it's a Playmobil forest scene that grows with each day before Christmas. Worth every penny. What sold me is that it contains a whole family of white-tailed deer, and foxes, to boot. Just by seeing the picture, Kalina has already determined that the deer and foxes will all be friends. (Side note: whenever I ask Kalina who her friends are, animals top the list. A few family members occasionally are mentioned.) Every day she wonders if she'll get a deer.

We love the calendar. Both of us. It's all I can do not to tear into each box and set up the entire scene right now. Kalina seems to have more patience than I do, but maybe just because she's reliant on my willpower and not her own (little does she know how fragile my willpower is on this matter!). Every morning when we open a box her face absolutely lights up as she pulls out the toy (as does mine, I'm sure)--even though the first day was just a tree and some grass, and the second day was just another tree and a little plant. She eats it up. Today some birds came to visit, complete with a bird feeder. I've peeked ahead and I know that the deer family will show up, fawn, then buck, then doe, on the 5th, 6th and 7th. If we had to wait any longer I'd be switching them out for the foliage.

And so, we'll keep counting down until the big day, at which point we'll have to find something new to do. At least we'll have new toys then. (Kidding--Christmas is not about toys, for heaven's sake! It only seems that way to small children and tired parents. :) )