Springtime of the Sisterly Soul

Don't tell Elise I'm borrowing
her hat! But how could I not
when it looks so cute on me?
Besides, the baby had one...

The first time you see your young children engaging each other in activities other than grabbing and fighting, it is like the first day that springtime's warm hope peeks in through your windows. The whole house looks cleaner, the air smells clearer and you no longer want to crawl into bed and stay there for months at a time. It's also quieter, without as much crying and for a moment you can hear a bird chirp.

This phenomenon is called play. It is often a social activity. And it is taking its first few breaths between my two youngest as they emerge from their cocoons of "I want what she has!" Deep breath.

Kalina, who calls the shots without knowing she calls the shots, has not minded ceding a healthy amount of her domain to the littlest one (besides, isn't she cute?), but Elise, who often has to resort to whining to get any attention (or so she'd like you to believe) has understandably dug in her heels at any request to share either Mommy or the family room rug ever since Naomi was big enough to scoot herself around and claim some of the territory.

One snowy weekend, we all made a
fairy mermaid placemat, thus anchoring
my spot as "The Best Mommy in
the World" (their words, not mine!)

But despite the shortcoming of being shorter and 1, Naomi, in her sisters' eyes, and especially the eyes of her littler big sister, is magically transitioning from being a near-constant threat to precious toys and a usurper of Mommy's arms and attention to an actual person who can play sea creatures and actually swim the fish around the same way she does.

This is huge, because of how far we've come and what it means. This little development has not come easy: it has taken minor bribery, constant vigilance, and a lot of outright flattery. "Wow, Naomi thinks you're just amazing, and she looks like she loves sea animals as much as you do! Look how she wants to copy everything you do because she thinks you're so great!"

At four, flattery is huge. It also helps when your little sister eases off her biting phase, and can say "purple" pretty well.

Kalina's Great Wall of China,
complete with Emperor
palace and throne. No
forced labor required. (In the
background, check out the
much-adored kids-around-the
world paper dolls she made.)

All of the efforts seem to be working, because Elise only protested a little last time the three of us (minus Kalina, who was off building the Great Wall of China for a raging emperor) played sea creatures a little, and the two littles even manged to continue playing a few minutes in a row after I crept away. Added bonus: it ended in neither happy nor sad screams.

In fact, Elise recently learned not only to skip, but that Naomi might possibly be a viable option as a playmate when Kalina is busy. In theory. It may be a while before she regularly turns to her little sister, although Elise's social nature might require it when she exhausts her other options. I'm working on grouping them together in subtle ways to speed this process along ("Kalina is going to do her math and can't play, but Elise, you have another sister you can play with! Wow, lucky you! Here she is now!"). I'm also contenting myself with peaceful ignoring.

Until a week or so ago, this idea was completely off the table, as Naomi was only good for tickling and being used as a plaything herself ("We can stack things on the baby!"). And I can't entirely blame Elise: Naomi is not innocent of mischief, including putting cherished toys into her mouth, objecting entirely to anyone reading a book that's not of her direct and immediate choosing and occasionally even snatching at toys. (Elise has been known to pull most of these stunts as well, as recently as today.) Bad behavior doesn't earn you friends, so all sisters have had to learn and re-learn the ancient art of Getting Along.

Elise is making a book of art.
If you think that's cool, you
should see her wall of art.

It's also a feat of branding: while Naomi still looks like a baby and often acts like a baby, I am attempting to remember, at least 20% of the time, not to refer to her as "the baby," so that the girls might realize she's a person, too (easier for Kalina, at the top of the pecking order, than Elise). I spend many minutes of every day trying to convince Elise, especially, that:
-She's not trying to get her sea creatures.
-Usually when she picks up her sisters' stuff, it's to bring it to them (true!).
-Even if she didn't, she wouldn't break the stuff because she's big now ("No she's not, she's little! I'm big!" retorts Elise in her biggest voice).
-Even if she did, we would fix it.

Elise is still mostly frantically unconvinced, despite my assurance that she used to be on the other end of the equation at a similar age and stage and came out of it just fine, to develop into the highly mature girl she is today.

Fortunately, Naomi plays her role, as the sweet little silly sister willing to go along with anything, very well. Eager to join in her sister's play, she'll happily mimic whatever goings on look fun and interesting, so long as she isn't super-absorbed in feeding her puppies, that is.

Sledding down the street.
Mush, Daddy!

Like her big sisters, Naomi runs circles on the rug to music (this is a triple favorite, and the bigs are even well-practiced in dodging the giddy gyrations of their toddler sister), flies animals around the house, practices gymnastics and parrots all the weird noises her sisters make, which is a lot. Naomi is quite adept at mimicry, and equally adept at getting smiles and laughter for her best efforts, despite a prejudiced reluctance on one or both sisters' parts. It really is cute, even though I know I'm in store for lots of mischief as they all get older.

Naomi also, by the way, happily mimics me as I sweep, clean, empty trash cans, cook and all the rest of my mommy work. As such, she is much more likely to pitch in and help out than her big sisters, although Kalina can often be convinced to do interesting kitchen work, and Elise will clean windows at a rate of 10 cents a piece (only the bottom half, but that takes us past the drool/handprint line so it works out) as she saves up for--you guessed it--more sea creatures.

And at this moment in time, Naomi is really good at all kinds of play, even toddleresque pretend play, or maybe it's just because she hasn't (yet) been tainted by all their sibling weirdness, the same that haunted my own siblings and I as we developed our own strange sense of humor, and that has forged sibling bonds since the beginning of time.

Sharing Grandpa's lap!

Either way, Naomi is a clean slate that I know will get drawn all over (literally if not figuratively), but that doesn't make too many dumb jokes yet, that doesn't think play = making loud noises and that doesn't invent all kinds of unfathomable and strange rules: "No, you can't move Elise's sea creatures because they have all just been born and are scared of you because you're big--look at how scared of you they are!" or "Mommy, be careful! You can't walk there or you'll fall into the hot lava and get eaten by a shark!" and even more stuff I get wrong all the time that's too weird to remember and changes anyway. The big girls will wreck all that soon enough, but for now, she's sweetly innocent of anything weirder than pretending to feed herself a dog bone.

Not that I don't have a special place in my heart for every single work of my kids' imagination, because I really do. Except for the non-sensical knock-knock jokes; those are awful but I can't find any grounds to put a stop to them, so my best resort is to sic them on each other. "Kalina, aren't you going to answer the door, Elise is knocking!" Then they can both laugh hysterically at terrible jokes and I can pretend I don't hear. (If you think I'm being too hard on the jokes, I'll have one of the girls give you a call...)

Kalina practicing one last
time before her amazing
piano performance at the
annual recital.

At any rate, I can safely say that at least 3 out of 4 of us would vote to keep Naomi, and while the last would prefer to keep her in a closet and pull her out on a whim, I am encouraged by the rays of hope I see that the relationship will thaw over the next season or year or decade or so.

And with real spring around the corner--and its flowers to maim together and puddles to get covered in, the sisterly relationships are sure to only blossom.

Check out that grip! Naomi could craft
all day, and asks for supplies like tape
and glue by name.

Homeschool PE. Lisa (the
cherished stuffed lamb) is
wearing her "snowsuit," and
in the background by the tree
you can see the little snow
slide Kalina made for her.

Elise likes to invent recipes,
such as spaghetti dipped in
honey, and then share them!
This one, called Coral Reefs,
consists of crackers, peanut
butter, marshmallows and, of
course, Goldfish. She is
writing a recipe book.

Elise dressed herself. Also,
she's starting to draw people!
(See the fridge)

Who came first?

Anyone want this stick?
Naomi and her favorite
hedgehog toy.

Many times during the day, I'm glad that Naomi is a firstborn. Confident, somewhat adventurous, strong-willed, relational and smart, she'll be a great leader of her sisters. She knows what she wants and how to get it--and has a lot of wants. Always preferring to walk through her toys rather than around them, and monopolize as much of Mommy's attention as possible, she clearly takes the lead. Naomi loves to learn new things and play with others. Which is why it's a shame that the baby of the family wasn't actually born first.

Kalina and her very, very detailed zoo!
They then proceeded to let each of
their people take home pets from it.

Then there's Kalina, my middle child. She's often needed someone to go ahead of her to face the giants (preschool teachers and other adults), and let her know they're not actually ogres, someone to reassure her that the backyard and basement are unscary places to play, even without a grownup, and someone to bike and swim before she does so she knows it's totally doable. And yet she's so lovely with younger kids (when she's not chasing the neighbor boy with a baseball bat, that is), it'd be a loss if she didn't have a little sibling to dote on. Now if only she'd managed to wedge herself between her two sisters in birth order when she was born.

For breakfast on her
birthday, Pink Bear was
served cake and chocolate
ice cream. Yum!

And finally, my youngest child, Elise. Cheerful, easygoing, a little goofy and able to keep up with kids twice her age (yet still needing Mommy snuggles on occasion), she's the perfect caboose to our train. She makes her sisters laugh and keeps us all in high spirits, plus she's always happy to be the "kid" or "kitten" when playing "Mom/Kid" or "Owner/Kitten." She never holds grudges very long, and was the easiest baby. Clearly, she's the ideal youngest child--happy to go along with whatever her big sisters have dreamed up, and make it even more fun. Too bad she's stuck in the middle instead.

It would seem that mistakes have been made, but I'm sure it's all in order somehow. Still, the point remains: who messed up my kids' birth order? And what do we do now? Maximize strengths? Minimize difficulties? Merely survive?

Happy 34th, Matt!

As I've learned over my 3+ years of intense sleep deprivation (nearing an end! Really!), what doesn't kill you only makes you stronger--or at least able to endure more of it. Which means that it probably does Kalina good to have to forge her own way, and Naomi good to go with the flow and Elise good to...well...honestly, Elise could make anything work. Elise will, however, never consent to be the ignored middle child--or she would voice her concerns at a very high decibel level.

Seeing as this shakeup will mean our family's dynamics will be quite different from the way either Matt or I grew up, we'll be looking forward to seeing how everyone gets along. That's putting it rather mildly. For instance, take Kalina. A rules-following firstborn, she leads her sisters in All That's Right. Yes, she laughs when Elise says poop (a million times a day). She is, after all, only 6. But she warns Elise not to do so when I'm around (I overhear). Thanks--I think? And she exercises caution in all things, encouraging anyone within earshot to do the same. Plus, with Big Sister Kalina at the helm, her little sisters will always feel heard and appreciated. Kalina is also happy to occasionally let them take the lead, especially when deeply engrossed in imagining birthday parties for stuffed animals and whatnot.  I imagine she'll bring a combination of good sense and imagination to all their troubles over the years, too.

Uncle Brian visited! And
Naomi let him hold her!

And then there's Naomi. What if she actually were my oldest child? Case in point--here's how Naomi is learning to walk:

1. Grab Mommy's hands and contort my body such that I'm standing, and Mommy has no choice but to be pulled along behind. Whew, I'm on my feet.

2. Writhe, flail, scream, whatever, whenever Mommy sits me down. Whew, we're walking again.

3. Walk everywhere, all the time. With Mommy. Because I must.

4. Run everywhere, all, the time, with Mommy.

5. Run to Mommy and collapse in her arms. Then to Daddy. Keep doing this to practice.

6. Run, collapse, run, collapse. I'm walking!

7. Run, don't walk, everywhere I go. Have a Big Person near me at all times to make sure I don't splat on my face, or worse. 

It's tough to be on the inside
looking out!

Naomi will conquer the world, as long as someone's there to catch her when the world occasionally conquers her.

As the oldest child, the baby could teach her sisters a thing or two about "taking the plunge" if she'd let them (I'm thinking of swim lessons...). Naomi would certainly be a fun big sister to Kalina and Elise, and Kalina need never fear even the darkest corner of the basement with Naomi in the lead, but who knows where the three of them would end up, or how far they could get at a run under Naomi's direction? 

Elise as an oldest child would also be lots of fun, but maybe a little too much, unless her position brought out rules-following capabilities that I'm as yet unaware of. Actually, considering her sense of humor, Elise does a good job of going along with the rules, which may be partially attributable to her positive nature and positive role model. But she loves mischief (fortunately, only mischief and not actually trouble) a bit too much for my sanity, and if she were at the lead, I would never be able to find my shoes.

We had a pre-bedtime "sleepover!"

And it's probably a good thing that Kalina isn't "stuck" in the middle, as her ability to lose herself to other worlds (in daydreaming-meets-dawdling style) could get her lost between her sisters, too. We would miss our Kalina! 

Naomi in the middle, as the strongest willed of the three (as far as I can tell) could overrule both her sisters, unless she settled down a bit in toddlerhood (and she may). It might take her big sisters as a united front, in fact, to not get plowed over. 

Elise is no slouch to play with either, though, and her usually cheerful disposition, emotional intuition and relational nature will smooth over a myriad of troubled emotions over the years, whether they come from her big sister or her little one. And as our guaranteed extrovert (the jury is still out on Naomi), she'll find it a relief to virtually always have someone around to talk to.

At Grandpa's house.

As youngest child, however, Elise would easily get babied and fussed over, and with two older sisters to follow might never come into her own. But wouldn't she be adorable? She'd enjoy the attention and would happily go along with whatever games and ideas her sisters could dream up. "Let's dress Elise up like a Christmas tree and then decorate her!" Sure! "Let's pretend Elise is a baby bird and sit on her until she hatches!" Why not?

Kalina as youngest would never, ever, ever get her way, save through major threats from me directed at her elders. She'd be very well protected, however, and that may be worth it to her in the end.

Staying up late for fireworks!

But who could survive the "youngest" role better than Naomi? Babyhood aside, she has a need to learn--and a talent for study, too. Most content when she's "working" on something, she'll enjoy the endless parade of newness her big sisters present to her. And rest assured, she will find a way to have her say, even overruling the two "bigs," being the strongest willed and a very shrill, loud screamer to boot (and mighty cute!). She's also charismatic and engaging, coercing us to play with her even from across the room. "Here's a toy for you, and a giant smile to go with it! But you'll have to come to me to get it, I won't come to you!" And we virtually always do. Because, after all, she's our baby.

Big sisters

Prettier than Grandpa's roses!

We recently started Elise on an allowance. It's a bit crazy--a 3 1/2-year-old getting an allowance--but neither of us really feel up to the task of explaining to her that she's younger than Kalina. It would take a lot of tears and a lot of convincing (especially when Kalina brings home a new toy every so often just because she's older), and we're pretty sure she would never forgive us. So we just give her a couple quarters a week, and consider it an investment in family peace.

[That being said, maybe we should give Kalina more credit--she's spent a good portion of her allowance on Elise and seems to enjoy indulging her little sister (or once, by her own admission, being able to play with her own toys without her little sister constantly asking to play with them). Elise has received small plastic Care Bears, a stuffed grey kitten, gum and more from her big sister's generosity.]

Elise's favorite activity at
Grandpa's house.

In this and other ways, Elise has been a "big sister" for almost as long as Kalina has. For example, Elise the Brave is usually the one who doesn't mind going down to the basement, or to the "scary" part of the basement, to retrieve the forgotten toy. Or to the neighbor's house alone without asking permission to knock on their door and ask the neighbor girl to play with both of them while Kalina watches from our yard. Kalina lets me call her "little Kalina," but Elise insists on "big," or at least "middle." And I'm pretty sure Kalina learned some of the nuances of bike riding from little Elise (don't tell her I called her that).

It does sometimes seem to confuse and frustrate Elise when she feels out of place among Kalina's friends, or can't run quite as fast as Kalina ("She always gets the swing first!"). But being a mere 3 1/2, poor thing, is never reason enough for her to give herself a break.

A pair of scientists.

Of course, we're still watching Elise unfold as an actual big sister. As Naomi has learned to scoot and crawl and become a real threat to Pink Bear and other treasured possessions (such as Mommy, who is still walking Naomi around in all her free time), Elise has, as you'd expect, sensed a tiny bit of competition. But Elise's natural generosity and easygoing spirit also shine through: "It's okay if Naomi puts Pink Bear in her mouth." What 3 1/2-year-old ever says that? Granted, Naomi is cuter than most babies.

Meanwhile, Kalina, who was a bit younger than Elise (at only 3 instead of 5 1/2, as Elise seems to be now) when Elise was Naomi's current age (did you follow that?), has settled quite naturally into the roll of substitute mommy. Although she occasionally gets it wrong (stop tickling the baby right before naptime!!!), she's occasionally almost on par with Daddy for quality of caretaking (stop tickling the baby right before naptime!!!). She patiently and sweetly plays with the baby, often stepping in without being asked, and winning some of the best grins of the household.

Naomi could do this all day!

Elise, by the way, has her own style of playing with Naomi, which often includes plain old silliness. I imagine Naomi will better understand the humor behind, "Look, Naomi, there's a giraffe on my head!" with a few months' experience ("Wait a second...giraffes don't belong on peoples' heads! Hahahaha!"), but the two are already forming their own sweet relationship.

Both big girls are ultra protective of their little sister. Sometimes more protective than is entirely convenient.
Kalina or Elise, panicking: "Mommy, the baby is playing with a napkin!!!"
Me, the hypocrite: "Um, I know, it's okay, I'm watching her."
Kalina or Elise: "But she's not supposed to play with napkins! She might tear off little pieces and eat them!!!"
Me, fully recognizing the very valid point and countering with what feels like a very valid point of my own: "Thank you, Sweetie, but this is the only way I'm going to be able to make lunch for us, and she's not trying to eat the napkin right now. If she does I'll take it away, I promise."
And so the big sisters are learning that all rules are relative and at the mercy of convenience. Bad mommy! I will have to undo all of this down the road, but for now, we need to eat lunch.

Kalina and Naomi playing happily.

Speaking of choking hazards, it's been made painfully obvious that girls as a species gravitate toward tiny objects. The big girls love miniature animals and shiny beads, and the baby loves them just as much. Beyond this, the big girls love building pet cages and landscapes out of blocks, and the baby has no problem with knocking them down as she explores their creations. We have navigated this territory before with the two big girls and everyone survived, but only through a  miserable combination of baby gates (which nobody really likes), new rules, sadness and mad grabs.

Tiny treasures aside, for the most part, the girls are actually helpful. They are happy to fetch Naomi's comfort animal--a hedgehog puppet that she attached to all by herself--attempt to distract her during fussy diaper changes or carseat transitions, feed her, read her naptime story and pile around her more toys than she could possibly play with at one sitting (partly because she doesn't like to sit still). I used to worry that Naomi would be alternately neglected and picked on; now I am pretty certain she'll be spoiled no end, never so much as having to tie her own shoes until she's eight years old.

One of Elise's favorite jobs
is to swing the baby.

I maintain that every baby should come with a 5-year-old and 3-year-old girl. Life is crazy, but more often than not, it's a fun kind of crazy. Many times a day I'm very thankful to have a couple of "big sisters" around, whether they're haphazardly trying to drag her away from potential choking hazards (which almost always provokes a rushed, "Thank you for helping, but please don't drag the baby!" from me) or pretending to sneeze on her (Kalina: "But she likes it!"). And I'm pretty sure Naomi is, too.

_____________

Some cute things the big girls have said lately:

Me: Wow, clouds and wind. What do we think of that?
Kalina: Clouds plus wind make rain!
Elise: And rain plus sun make a rainbow! And a rainbow makes colors! And colors make love! (Big, sweet smile.)
Kalina: And love makes imagination, and imagination makes fun, and fun makes happy!
Leave it to my girls to turn the possibility of rain into happiness.

We raised tadpoles! And are about to
release them.

Kalina: I want to be a queen for my birthday.
Elise: And then you can marry Jesus!

Elise: If I ever poof up and start to float away, just tell me to let out some of that air, and I will float back down.

Elise, every so often: Am I magic?
She's pretty convinced she is. When asked what her super powers are:
"I'm super-strong. I can lift my bike. And I can talk without talking." (She means thinking.) What's her favorite thing to say without saying it? "I love you."

Squish, squish, yum!

All about Naomi:

In her 9th month, Naomi worked her hardest on half a dozen different milestones. I think she might say "ma-ma-ma and almost mean it," and possibly even "ball," and her pincer grasp can easily get Cheerios, peas and other small bits of food into her mouth, a process she relishes. In fact, her favorite way to eat her food is by squishing it first. Squish, squish, yum...squish, squish, yum. And in this way, she actually works up a pretty decent appetite, even while extinguishing ours.

All the rest of the developments have been gross motor skills that have nothing to do with squishing macaroni and cheese. Naomi waved at Kalina on Wednesday, and at Daddy today. She can pull up to standing, sometimes bend down and keep her balance, stand for a few seconds by herself, walk one-handed and dance. She can crawl, too, but she still prefers walking unless she has proper motivation. And my personal favorite, she gives hugs on command--but only if she loves you. :)

We sold a couple cups of lemonade
during a neighborhood garage sale!
Thank goodness everyone let us
keep the change...

The baby continues to love studying things and freaking out if you pull her away too early. Her personality is very interactive--she occasionally tries to engage her big sisters in play, enjoys "showing off" and wavers back and forth between quite cheerful and furious, depending on whether or not she is doing something she wants to be doing. Naomi is not mellow, but is happy to be distracted for reasonable periods of time as long as the distraction is worth her time.

All the girls in Kalina's preschool
class on "graduation" day!

The kids' museum carts in a beach and
my girls could've played all day.

Naomi's, "This is a
fascinating new substance!"
face. She's also mad at me
for not letting her sit in a
sandy stream. Sorry baby!

So far, so good: Naomi likes
swinging. Will it last?

A tea party with pretend tea
(juice) but real teacups.

Friends from Durham visited!

Look out family room, here comes Naomi!

Baby seal or baby baby? Would she
be even cuter if covered in a fine layer
of silky fur?

I've known this day would come. I've known, in fact, for more than a year. It's been impossible to deny, as hard as I've tried, that one day we'd have a grabby baby on the loose in our home, wreaking adorable, drooly havoc on anything she manages to approach. That's right, the baby can roll.

Naomi has been able to kind of, or occasionally, roll for at least a month or two, and especially from back to front. At first, the motion surprised her, and not always in a good way as she lands her stomach or back on a hard, plastic toy (think of stepping on Legos--ouch!), or her head flops onto the floor. Once rolling started to happen more often, she learned to kind of duck her head in and smooth the transition so that it wouldn't be quite so uncomfortable to roll from front to back--at least if there are no toys in the way. And then she decided that rolling was okay, and could be a new mode of transportation. Now, Naomi is working on purposeful, goal-oriented rolling. The baby still has not learned to plan her rolls to avoid planting on toys, but I assume that comes next. I don't think she's ever gotten more than about five rolls away from her starting point (although that has gotten her under both her and Elise's beds), but it's enough to cause some big changes around our house.

Goofy girls. Naomi has the best big
sisters ever.

It is a much different situation from last time. For one, Kalina no longer freaks out (in a big way) when another child so much as glances at her stuffed lamb (Lisa, who is now a mother herself---sniff!). The girls love when I tell stories about how Baby Elise briefly look at Lamby, as she was called then, from across the room and Kalina would melt into tears, convinced of her little sister's involvement in a massive conspiracy to kidnap the stuffed animal and keep her for herself. I think only time changed her mind--I sure couldn't. But it's a relief that we don't do that anymore.

In fact, good-natured, generous Elise is so used to having a sister around that she really only seems concerned about her toys entering the baby's mouth, or drool leaking onto them. I know I will never be able to convince her, "it's just cute baby spit," so Naomi will have to learn the rule, "No putting your sister's stuffed animals into your mouth" before she even gains much of a concept about what constitutes a stuffed animal ("Is that the plastic block that fits into the hole? No? Shoot, I've got this all wrong."). But the baby doesn't suffer much at all at the hands of her doting big sisters, so this is a worthy compromise. Besides, she'll have to learn it sometime.

I love baby profiles. I may
have mentioned that before.

The bigger problem is that both of the big girls have firmly moved into the "millions of tiny toys" stage of girlhood, which they happily scatter over the house like raindrops. Aside from driving me slightly crazy, it means that every time Naomi rolls over, there's a new choking hazard.

On my side is the fact that while Naomi can certainly gnaw on a plastic ring for a while, she at least starts with her fingertips. Primed and ready at almost every calm and alert moment she has, her fingers love to touch and study. Our little scientist first tentatively touches an object, then scrapes it with her little fingernails, then pats it if it's big and drum-like, or grabs and manipulates it if it's small and hand-held. Her mouth is always at the ready, but not always in use.

And fortunately, the big girls are hyper-aware of what constitutes a choking hazard (especially if the choking hazard happens to be a prized possession). They're also hyper-aware of whenever the baby is playing with something that's not specifically a baby toy (again, especially if it's a prized possession), but we've had the "We share our toys unless they're put away in your room" discussion and I think they're okay with the arrangement as long as I occasionally let them borrow some of Naomi's shape sorters and rubbery animals and whatnot. Because apparently shape sorters are still fun if you're 3 1/2 or 5 1/2? Maybe it's fun to be an absolute pro at them.

The elusive finger-in-mouth
picture! Naomi loves chewing
on her finger. It's cute. It
comes out every time I pull
out the camera because it
wants to touch the camera.

We do have one new rule: for now, anything on the family room rug has to be fair game for Naomi. In return, I promise to keep her out of the actual playroom when the big sisters are playing in there. For now. Even if I have to fence it off. I think this will keep us all from going crazy except, potentially, Naomi when she realizes there's a treasure trove of really good toys within crawling distance.

Did somebody say "crawling?" That'll never happen...

Pbthbthpbhthbth. Something else
Naomi has learned lately.

This thing spins. And it spins
again. And again. And again.
I wonder if it'll do it again.
Naomi the scientist, and the
one who has most loved the
exersaucer. And most
studied it.

Whee! Spinning!

Cute things

Elise and Woolly

One of the worst possible things that can happen if you're a caterpillar is to be found by a young child who is, in fact, interested in caterpillars. Especially if you're fuzzy or, woolly, in the case of a certain woolly bear caterpillar that used to live in our yard, but now lives in a small bug cage that gets carried place to place by a toddler. And given rides.

Poor Woolly, as we call him! Elise is beyond delighted with her new pet, found for her one evening by Daddy. She loves to hold him and does so as often as possible, either taking him out of his cage inside the house when she forgets that it's against the rules (no holding bugs in the house!) or frequently asking to be taken outside so she can hold him and watch him inch up her arm or on her shirt. She's surprisingly gentle when she has to pull him off to drop him back in the cage, although we usually let Kalina do the task, just in case.

And we use "him" loosely--for a while, it was a girl caterpillar until Elise realized we didn't really know for sure. He's been to the park, as well as for multiple rides in the van, our toy grocery cart and our toy car. He's been down slides, and he's been spun in circles many times. We gather fresh food for Woolly daily, and Elise is aware that at some point we'll have to release him. Hopefully he will survive long enough for that reward, as he's been quite the trooper.

The big girls were fighting
over who got to hug the
baby. The baby won.

Elise to Kalina: "If I saw a kitten I would run outside...I would ask a grownup, then run outside and bring in the kitten as quickly as possible."
Kalina to Elise: "If I saw a kitten, I would bring it inside and paint it rainbow colors. Then I would go over it with some shiny stuff so it shines."


Naomi has found her hands and her voice! She also smiles on request if you ask nicely and she's in a good mood. So now her pastimes are: staring at the world around her, very contemplatively; sucking on her fists and cooing out adorable little conversations.

She visited the pediatrician last Monday (the 21st) for her two-month appointment and weighed 9 lbs. 7 ounces, and was 21.5 inches long. She's tiny! The baby did not mind the examination, despite the fact that she'd finally fallen asleep mere seconds before the nurse asked me to undress her and get her ready to be weighed. She did mind the shots, very much. So much that I actually called a friend to pick up some infant Tylenol for me, which she very kindly did. What kind of mother of three doesn't have infant Tylenol?!?

Aunt Debbie gets to hold
Naomi!

We traveled to my cousin's wedding! In a different state! Five hours away! And survived to tell about it! It was hard, but not as hard as it could've been. In short, the baby slept through most of it!

The big girls loved the trip, and especially the hotel stay. Matt and Elise decided to sleep in Grandpa Tom's room, which Elise turned into a mini-sleepover. Long after the light had been turned off, she was still chattering away about how sleepy she wasn't, and had both the guys cracking up every time she opened her mouth.

Kalina, on the other hand, was happy to turn out the light and go to sleep--she takes after her mommy!

What does Elise do when
faced with a table full of
Hershey's kisses? Eat
them as quickly as possible,
and raid neighboring tables
for more.

The wedding was lovely--Elise's favorite part (and probably Kalina's, even though she's less vocal about it) was the endless supply of Hershey's kisses on the tables at the reception. They also liked the desserts, potato chips and punch. What's not to like? Naomi did not like the wedding--it was too loud and there was no place for her to relax. She was thrilled to be back in our somewhat quiet hotel room, and even happier to be back on her playtime blanket at home.


The big girls and I have a shaky, unofficial agreement. They can visit each other in their rooms at downtime as long as I don't "know" about it. That means even if they get into a fight, achieve minor injuries (and believe me, our injuries are usually quite minor) or spill caterpillar excrement on Kalina's carpet. I need to figure out what to do about this, but I'm buying time by pretending I don't know about it.


And that is all for now. Happy Halloween! Pics to come!

Aw!

Ready or not?

This is why I love having
girls.

People often, kindly, ask me how my pregnancy is going, and whether or not I'm ready for a new baby. It's such a big question, that second one.

So I'll answer the first one first. The pregnancy is going fine. I'm only just entering the achy, insomniac stage--a month or two later than last time, for which I'm grateful every day. That doesn't mean I don't have my share of weird symptoms and issues (why is my foot swollen and hurting? Why all the indigestion? Why do the kids need something, or try to crawl on me, every single time I sit down?!?)

I had a doctor appointment Friday, and brought the girls for the first time since the big ultrasound. Except for the super-annoying, super-common chant of, "I'm bored, I'm tired, I'm hungry," they behaved like princesses (the good kind, not the snobby kind) and enjoyed seeing Mommy in the hot seat for once (I wonder if they wished I'd gotten a shot).

College friends!

I was rather charmed that when the doctor pulled out the tape measure and the heartbeat thingy, and two smiling faces peered over the table. The girls, up unprompted off the chair they'd been nicely sharing under threat of having to stand instead, were pretty excited to check on their baby sister! It was their favorite part, of course, aside from introducing their stuffed animals to the surprisingly interested nurse and the doctor.

I'm measuring 32 weeks (I'm 35 along) and didn't gain weight despite my food tour of Durham with Aunt Nancy. Has the baby dropped? Is it just because it was morning and I'm smaller in the mornings? I'll have an ultrasound next time to make sure everything's okay; I'm not really worried.

And onto the second question: are we ready?

ISU: the next generation.

Are we ever ready? Is it even possible? The truth is, we are definitely not ready in a practical sense. Definitely not. If the baby comes now, she'll be sleeping in a drawer, wearing outfits that have not recently been washed and wearing her sister's size 5 diapers (they're just for nighttime), plus whatever we can nab from the hospital. Oh, the horror.

The children have stopped asking me if I'm going to have the baby today, but they'd probably better start up again in the next few weeks. And we've been working a lot on getting ready for the little one.

For instance, we've thoroughly scrutinized photos of Baby Kalina and Baby Elise, read a few "I'm a big sister now" types of books, ensured that the baby has a "soft blankie" (this is a big one for Elise), covered "baby etiquette" in minor detail (so far), and stocked her room with a few presents people have given us (Elise is very protective of the baby's things for her).

We took our houseguests to the
botanical garden!

Still to do:
-Take a picture of my growing belly
-Fill the freezer
-Get the baby's room, clothes and diapers ready
-Track down all the baby equipment that's scattered throughout 3 different areas of the house
-Clean, clean, clean
-Visit the zoo, the children's museum and all the other fun places for the "last time." (Ever?!? I can't help but wonder)
-Finish all my freelance work to the best of my ability
-Give kids a crash course in all the "self care" items I've been neglecting for months
-Pack the hospital bag
-Finish Elise's and Kalina's baby books (eek! but I have this blog, right?)

In short, it does feel like I'm preparing for the end of the world. "It's not the end, it's the beginning!" I try to tell myself. We'll do it all in August: there's time, right?

The kids are getting ready in their own ways, which includes asking lots of good questions (Will the baby have hair? Kalina thinks no, Elise and Mommy think yes. "Will the baby fall on the floor when she pops out of your tummy?" -Kalina) and making lots of assumptions ("If the baby crawls toward bath water that's too hot, I will scoop it up and pull it away!" -Elise "I will catch the baby when she pops out of your tummy!" -Elise). They are excited for the baby to walk, run ("It'll be the slowest runner!" -Kalina), talk, toddle, sing, laugh, smile, eat mushed-up food, eat birthday cake, and all the rest. Me too. Kalina has also just begun to be on the lookout for things the baby shouldn't put in her mouth. I have a feeling she will be an annoyingly vigilant big sister (much to her mommy's delight). They do anticipate her being very cute--a unanimous sentiment in our family.

They're prepared to laugh at the baby's antics, from expecting her to "sing cute little songs" to swing in the baby swing. They anticipate that a highlight will be having her grab their fingers (they're not far off, honestly!). Elise also anticipates a lot of waaah-waaaaahing (as she calls it). 

[Elise, as an aside, also has a baby in her tummy. It used to be Ellie, her doll, who was born on her birthday (so the story goes), but now it's a boy baby. Ask her if you can feel the baby move sometime...]

And they're already starting to bond. They like to say hi through my tummy and, occasionally, into my mouth (they think that'll help the baby hear them). 

But I don't think they have any idea how much their world will be changed (they think they're tired now!). Oh well, they like surprises. Right??